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Smart vs Dumb
Smart man + Smart Woman = Romance Smart Man + Dumb Woman = Pregnancy Dumb Man + Smart Woman = ...
Smart Blond
Once there was a blonde who wanted to prove to people that she wasn't just a dumb blonde. So she ...
Stupid
A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, " ...
Office Arithmatic
OFFICE ARITHMETIC Smart boss + smart employee = profit Smart boss + dumb employee = production ...
You Do The Math...
You Do The Math... ROMANCE MATHEMATICS Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb ...
Romance Mathematics
ROMANCE MATHEMATICS Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb woman = affair Dumb man ...
Arguement
During a friendly argument, my husband asked me why I married him in the first place.
"I ...
Nudist Camp
A young boy had been taken for his first visit to a nudist camp by his parents. He was surprised ...
Double pane energy-efficient
Dear Diary, Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive double pane ...
Blond vs Ventriloquist
A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a ...
Cash
In a shop for kids, Peter selects a toy car, comes to the cash desk and gives the cashier money- ...
A blonde Paintjob
This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these blonde jokes and how all ...
The true meaning of male statements
Statement: "I'm a Romantic." True Meaning: "I'm poor." Statement: "You're the only girl I've ...
Creation
CREATION A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful ...
More blondes 6
What do you call a blonde with two brain cells? Pregnant. How do you get a one-armed blonde out ...
Kids Jokes
Boss: Where were you born? Sardarji: India. Boss: Which part? Sardarji: What do you mean which ...
A Blonde
Guy is in a bar and strikes up a conversation with a dumb blond. "I'm curious, do you smoke after ...
Facts
10 Facts About You: 1. You're reading this now. 2. You're realizing that this is a stupid fact. ...
P.M.S.
Q: How many women with PMS does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One. ONE!! And do you know ...
Hipsters
I met two hipsters today, they had the same outfit, shirt, trousers, even the belt! I asked "did ...
Cat
“Our cat was stupid enough to drink some petrol yesterday. She spent two hours racing through the ...
Test
If a rooster's on top of a barn door and lays an egg, does the egg fall on the north or the south ...
Salad
I made a chicken salad today. ...
Women
Why do women pay more attention to their appearance than improving their minds? Because most men ...
Mama
Yo' Mama is so stupid, when they said, "Order ...
Yo Momma
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in ...
Manners
I don’t know what is with the youth today. No manners. They turn 16 and go on stupid wild parties ...
Difference
I hate it when people don't know the ...
Fish
What do you call a ...
Knock Knock
I hate those people who knock on your door and tell you you need to get "saved" or you'll "burn" ...
Stupid
I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative ...
Computer
Stupid computer! I dropped my ...
Straight Line
A cop is doing standard patrol when he notices a car swerving all over the road. He quickly turns ...
Walk the Line
A cop is doing standard patrol when he notices a car swerving all over the road. He quickly turns ...
Beautiful Blond
A beautiful blonde walks up to a craps table. She bets ten thousand on one roll of the dice. She ...
The strong young Man
The strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of ...
Nobody
I’m changing my username to “Nobody” That way when I post something stupid I can like it and ...
6 TRUTHS OF LIFE
6 Indisputable Truths Of Life 1. NO matter how hard you try, you cannot stick your tongue out ...
Quips
"To be stupid, selfish, and have good health are three requirements for happiness, though if ...
Circle
During basic army training, a sergeant was telling his group how a submachine gun sprayed bullets. ...
Seagull
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were walking Along the beach. A seagull flies over and craps ...
Grandpas drive
A grandfather always made a special effort with his grandchildren. Many Sunday mornings he would ...
Height
Bubba and Junior were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up. A woman walked by and ...
A husband and his blonde wife
A husband and his blonde wife were driving along the country side one Sunday just putt puttin along. ...
Bubba and Junior
Bubba and Junior were standing at the base of a flagpole. A woman walked by and asked what they ...
Home from Work
A guy comes home from work, walks into his bedroom, and finds a stranger doing his wife. He says, " ...
Homeless
I had an encounter with a homeless man last year that I'll never forget. That day, my boss ...
Three Dumb Hunters
Three idiots decide to go hunting. The first one says he's going to get a buck. He goes out, and ...
Dumb Kid
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer,"This is the dumbest kid ...
Could have been
An elderly couple were killed in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by ...
The Sun
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, 'We were the first ...
Political Correctness
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT: 1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She ...
Principal
Boy: Our principal so stupid Girl: Don't you know who I am? Boy: No Girl: I'm the principal's ...
Actual Job Interviews
We’ve been over this before: Stupid doesn’t play well on job interviews. Hiring managers ...
Rolling the Dice
Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very attractive blonde woman arrived and ...
Crabs
A lawyer boarded an airplane in New Orleans with a box of frozen crabs and asked a blonde flight ...
Coach
At one point during a game, the coach called one of his 9-year-old baseball players aside and sked, ...
I Wish I Was a Bear
One of the female fans sent this:
I Wish I Was a Bear
If you're a bear, you get to ...
Punk
I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Richard, the 11 year old next door whose bedroom ...
Devil
A mathematician, a philosopher, and a blonde all go to Hell and receive a challenge from the Devil - ...
Learn Chinese in 5 minutes
Learn Chinese in 5 minutes (You MUST read them aloud) English - Chinese That's not right! ...
Nickels and Dimes
Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. Their ...
Words of Wisdom from Kids
Never trust a dog to watch your food. - Patrick, age 10 When your dad is mad and asks you, “Do I ...
Don't say this to a cop
The top 20 things not to say to a cop when he pulls you over. 20. I can't reach my license ...
Employee Insults
“Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.” “I ...
Paint the Porch
A blonde moves to Beverly Hills, hoping to find an acting job. After a couple weeks with no luck, ...
A thought...
As I lay on my bed, thinking about you, I feel this strong urge to grab you and squeeze you, ...
An old man, a boy & a donkey
An old man, a boy & a donkey were going to town. The boy rode on the donkey & the old man walked. ...
Liver and Cheese
Three handsome male dogs are walking down the street when they see a beautiful, enticing, female ...
Students
These are actual comments made on students report cards by teachers in the New York City public ...
Santa
Santa was very cross. It was Christmas Eve and NOTHING was going right. Mrs. Claus had burned all ...
American Tourists
A group of Americans are touring Ireland. One of the women in the group is a real curmudgeon, ...
Two little old ladies
Two little old ladies were sitting on a park bench outside the local town hall where a Flower Show ...
Black belt degrees
Requirements for 11th Degree Black Belt Master of Judo Well before testing for this rank ...
A Trucker
A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, "I want three flat tires, a ...
New Years Eve Party
We were dressed and ready to go out for the New Years Eve Party. We turned on a night light, turned ...
The truck stop
A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, I want three flat tires, a ...
Men.....
Question: What is the difference between men and puppies? Answer: Puppies grow up. Question: ...
More blondes 18
Q: Why did the blonde drive into the ditch? A: To turn the blinker off. Q: Why did the blonde ...
Easter Bunny
Easter Bunny Q. What do you call a rabbit with fleas? A. Bugs Bunny Q. What does the ...
Dumb
Any time you feel dumb, don't worry. Check out the following excerpts from a "Wall Street Journal" ...
A Blonde's Year in Review
A Blonde's Year in Review January Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight. ...
Dressed and Ready
A couple was dressed and ready to go out into the city for the evening. They turned on a night ...
Useful work phrases
1. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. 2. The fact that no ...
Product Warnings 1
PRODUCT WARNINGS Dumb and Funny Warning Labels On Products: Liquid Plummer Warning: Do not ...
English language
Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language? Let's face it ...
Seems to make sense part 2
-Laugh at your problems, everybody else does. -Artificial intelligence is no match for natural ...
Who Knew? Did You?
In George Washington's days, there were no cameras. One's image was either sculpted or painted. ...
Why English Is Hard To Learn
Why English Is Hard To Learn Youve gotta admit, its a pretty stupid language. Id hate to be a ...
Sports Quotes
Funny but Dumb Quotes From the World of Sports "I'm rich. What am I supposed to do, hide it?" ...
Perfect woman, perfect attitude.....
Perfect woman, perfect attitude..... 1. I'll swallow it all, I love the taste. 2. Are you ...
Why, Why, Why
Why, Why, Why Do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead? ...
Elephant
In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University . ...
This Guy Knows Math
This Guy Knows Math I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver, who cut ...
Why the US is in deep trouble
Why the US is in deep trouble A DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of why. 1. I ...
Oil Change instructions
Oil Change instructions for women: 1) Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 miles ...
Old Prospector
An old prospector shuffled into the town of El Indio, Texas leading an old tired mule. The old man ...
Product Warnings 2
Product Warnings Dumb and Funny Warning Labels On Products: Old Spice Red Zone Deoderant Use ...
THINGS YOUD LOVE TO SAY OUT LOUD AT WORK
THINGS YOUD LOVE TO SAY OUT LOUD AT WORK 1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full ...
Train
There was a man in Bulgaria who drove a train for a living. He loved his job, driving a train ...
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