jokes about work
- More Jobs
- "Young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work?"
"I ought to be able to. I've had ten ...
- Job
- My boss told me yesterday, “Don’t dress for the job you have, dress for the job you want”. ...
- A Job
- I've found a job helping a one armed ...
- Late for work!
- He just couldn't seem to get to work on time. Every day, 5, 10 minutes late. But he was a good ...
- Office Arithmatic
- OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
...
- Christmas Job
- How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit. ...
- At Work
- Bob Smith was sick of his job and was determined to find work elsewhere. But no matter how hard he ...
- Work
- At work there were three women, a Brunette, a Red Head, and a Blonde, who worked together at the ...
- Discipline
- A frustrated father told a work colleague: “When I was a youngster, I was disciplined by being ...
- Sick Leave
- I urgently needed a few days off work, but, I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave.
I ...
- Prison
- Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison. During his stay, he got along well with the guards ...
- Andy
- Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison. During his stay, he got along well with the guards ...
- Prison
- Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison. During his stay, he got along well with the guards ...
- Logician
- A logician had a baby. His colleague asked, " ...
- 50-50
- A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law. I welcome you into the family, ...
- Work
- Salesman: This computer will cut your workload by 50%.
Office Manager: That's great, I'll take two ...
- Office Game
- Here's a way to spice up your office. Pick two or three colleagues and agree to play the Office ...
- Late
- When a man showed up at work an hour late for the second time in a week, his boss called him into ...
- Newest son-in-law
- A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law. "I love my daughter, and now I ...
- Work
- Boss: Who said that just because I tried to kiss you at last month's Christmas party, you could ...
- New Job
- Pat and Mick have just started their job installing telegraph poles. At the end of the first week ...
- Job
- Employer to applicant: "In this job we need someone who is responsible."
Applicant: "I'm the one ...
- Pfesident
- Steve Jobs would have been a better president than Trump.
But I guess it's not fair to compare ...
- The Boss
- Three girls all worked in the same office with the same female boss.
Each day, they noticed the ...
- Blonde Line Painter
- A road crew supervisor hired a nice-looking blonde woman to assist with painting the yellow line ...
- Duck
- A duck walks into a job center and says to the man behind the desk 'Excuse me; I'm looking for a ...
- 9 to 5
- "So you currently work 9 to 5, Monday through Friday," said my boss.
"That is right," I replied.
...
- Job
- I think I want a job cleaning mirrors. It's ...
- Work
- I woke up suddenly terrified I'm late for work. ...
- Electrician
- Electrician by trade, looking for work. I have to admit I'm not really good at this job and people ...
- Job Interview
- Job interview in a psychiatry:
So youâre interested in working with us. What is your ...
- job
- I recently quit my job as an Helicopter ...
- Husband Store
- A brand new store has just opened in New York City that sells Husbands. When
women go to choose a ...
- Drinking At Work
- Here's a few great reasons to allow drinking in the workplace...
1. It's an incentive to show up. ...
- Job
- My first job was working at an orange juice factory
..but, I got canned because I couldnât ...
- Trump
- You can really see how much Trump cares about creating jobs in this country.
The White House ...
- History
- Two history professors have been sitting on the veranda, watching the sunset.
As they get up, one ...
- Smith
- Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. "Boss," he says, "we're doing some heavy ...
- Engineer
- A man went to school to be an engineer but after 4 years and lots of hard work, he discovered he ...
- The Boss
- The boss was complaining in a staff meeting the other day that he wasn't getting any respect.
...
- Stopping by the Office
- Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive's wife stopped by his office.
She found him with ...
- Work
- A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with ...
- Cough
- I called work this morning and whispered, "Sorry boss, I can't come in today. I have a wee cough." ...
- Wee
- I called work this morning and whispered, "Sorry boss, I can't come in today. I have a wee cough." ...
- Cracking the Human Resource Code
- COMPETITIVE SALARY
Most of our competitors don't pay much either.
"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY"
...
- Tired
- For a couple years I 've been blaming it on lack of sleep and too much pressure from my job, but ...
- Help the Wife
- Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. âBoss,â he says, âweâre doing some ...
- Job
- Job interviewer: âAnd where would you see yourself in five yearsâ time Mr. Jeffries?"
Me: " ...
- New Job
- Boss (to the new employee): We are very keen on cleanliness. Did you wipe your feet on the mat as ...
- Evaluation Comments
- Dictionary of Evaluation Comments
Some of you might like to know what the supervisor is really ...
- Evaluation Comments
- Some of you might like to know what the supervisor is really saying in all those glowing employee ...
- At Work
- At work
A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the pants.
Don't be ...
- Watchman
- A man is being interviewed for a job.
âWhat are your qualifications for the job of night ...
- Sick Day
- A man calls in to work.
"I can't come in today.."
The boss says, "Why what's wrong?" "
My ...
- Shovels
- One morning a local highway department crew reaches their job-site and realizes they have forgotten ...
- Actual Job Interviews
- Weâve been over this before:
Stupid doesnât play well on job interviews. Hiring managers ...
- Hate your Job?
- Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so?
There's a support group for that.
It's called ...
- Seat
- Every time I go to talk with my boss, he politely asks me to take a seat in his office.
It was ...
- Job at the Bank
- I lost my job at the bank.
A woman asked ...
- Why Men Can't Win
- Why Men Can't Win
If you work too hard, there is never any time for her. If you don't work ...
- Ten Top Things That Sound Dirty At The Office, But Aren't
- Ten Top Things That Sound Dirty At The Office, But Aren't:
10. I need to whip it out by 5.
9. ...
- The Shredder
- A young engineer was leaving the office at 3.45 p.m. when he found the acting CEO standing in front ...
- Blond Job
- A blond walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask her a few ...
- Loudspeaker
- A voice on the office loudspeaker announced: "We will be testing the speaker system to make sure it ...
- Job Interview
- An office manager was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening.
After sorting ...
- Understanting Help Wanted Ads
- Understanting Help Wanted Ads
What we say:Competitive Salary
What we mean: We remain ...
- Work
- They say good, honest work never did anybody any ...
- Responsible
- I went for a job interview today and the manager said,"We're looking for someone who is responsible" ...
- Spy
- A man applied for a job as an industrial spy. Together with several other applicants, he was given ...
- Don't argue with a Vet!!
- I got this story sent: One day at the veterinarian's office where I take my cat, a
man and the ...
- New CEO
- So the new CEO decides it's time to rid the company of slackers.
On a tour of the facilities, he ...
- Paint the Porch
- A blonde moves to Beverly Hills, hoping to find an acting job. After a couple weeks with no luck, ...
- Babies
- Four expectant fathers pace in a hospital waiting room while their wives are in labor. The nurse ...
- Lemons
- A woman applying for a job in a Florida lemon grove seemed too qualified for the job.
'Look ...
- Divorced
- Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. ...
- Divorced
- Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. ...
- Four expectant fathers
- Four expectant fathers pace in a hospital waiting room while their wives are in labor. The nurse ...
- How to Please Your I.T. Department
- 01. When you call us to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of ...
- Depressed
- A man walked into a therapist's office looking very depressed. "Doc, you've got to help me. I can't ...
- A young guy from Missouri
- A young guy from Missouri moves to Florida and goes to a big "everything under the roof department ...
- The pretty young secretary
- The pretty young secretary had been transferred to the companys Dallas office.
"We operate the ...
- Prison vs. Work
- -- In prison, you spend the majority of your time in an 8' X 10' cell. At work, you spend most of ...
- Farmer
- âI love my job!â exclaimed the farmer.
âAll you do is boss me around all day!â complained ...
- A Dentist's Office
- A man and his wife walked into a dentist's office.
The man said to the dentist, "Doc, I'm in one ...
- Farmer
- "I love my job!" said the farmer
"All you do is boss us around all day" said the sheep
"What ...
- Prison or Work
- IN PRISON: You spend the majority of your time in a 10X10 cell.
AT WORK: You spend the majority of ...
- A few Days off
- I decided that I needed a few days off and realized that I had run out of vacation time already. ...
- Memo from Accounting Department
- It has come to our attention recently that many of you have been turning in time sheets that ...
- Pretty Pussy
- John gets home from work one day and finds his pretty blonde wife has been crying.
"What's wrong?" ...
- Lumberjack
- A lumberjack applies for a job and gets called for an interview. The interviewer asks him, âSo, ...
- Job
- A job applicant was asked, âWhat would you consider to be your main strengths and weaknesses?â
...
- Nice
- The population of this country is 300 million.
160 million are retired.
That leaves 140 million ...
- Post office
- A little boy was waiting for his mother to come out of the
grocery Store. As he waited, he was ...
- Job
- A man went to apply for a job. After filling out all of his applications, he waited anxiously for ...
- Camping
- Getting away from their high-stress jobs, a couple spends relaxing weekends in their motor home. ...
- Christmas Jokes 4
- 16. What do you call an obnoxious reindeer?
Rude-olph.
17. How is Christmas exactly like your ...
- Excuse
- Jones came into the office an hour late for the third time in one week and found the boss waiting ...
- Fishing
- A man phones home from the office and tells his wife, "Something has just come up. I need to go ...
- Prison Vs Work
- Prison Vs Work
IN PRISON..........you spend the majority of your time in a 10X10 cell.
AT WORK.. ...
- Funeral
- Oh, I didnât expect you at work today Mr. Brundy, isnât it your mother-in-lawâs funeral today? ...