jokes about wife

My Wife has a grumpy bag
hiding from the wife sign at a bar
this lady either got divorced or she married groot
My wife asked me to label the plugs
Guy didnt know what business his wife was in
A good wife can bring balance to your life
Do you feel dominated by your wife
Yesterday my wife ran away with my friend Mike
Warning, machine takes money #ex #wife
marriage is all about compromise
Every time you talk to your wife
My wife says I cant have another dog
My wife gave me 200 dollars for a Christmas tree
My son asked what it is like to be married #ipod
A wife is like a hand granade
When your wife asks you to make a grocery list
Your wife called and said #buy #motor
A picture of darth vaders wife
my wife is weird #conversation #angry
Math made simple if you have $20 #wife
Machine takes money #ex #wife
comparing boys and girls #single #married
overenthusiastic girlfriend is bad news #marriage
men submissive to woman
Every man has this look when his wife is driving
my wife isnt thrilled about my new game
sick wife carry to kitchen to make breakfast
wife of the year carring case of Budweiser through the snow
santa explaining his wife he saw his old girlfriend
Wives and Husbands and more
Wives and Husbands and more Wife: "What are you doing?" Husband: "Nothing." Wife: "Nothing...? ...
Married
A year after marriage, wife complains to husband that he promised he would love her the same even ...
More Wives
More Wives I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn' ...
When I die?
WIFE: "If I died first, would you remarry?"
HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"
WIFE: "Why ...
Two choices in Life
You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, Or get married and wish you ...
Wives
Wives When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. -David ...
Married...how many?
A man and a woman had been married some time when the woman began to question her husband. "I know ...
Married
A woman in her eighties made the evening news because she was getting married for the fourth time. ...
Marriage Seminar
MARRIAGE SEMINAR While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication, Tom and his wife ...
Married Couple
This married couple were sitting in a fine restaurant when the wife looks over at a nearby table ...
Marriage
The local news station was interviewing an 84-year-old lady because she had just gotten married -- ...
A married couple in their early 60s
A married couple in their early 60s was out celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, ...
Marriage
While attending a Marriage seminar dealing with communication, Jack and his wife, Barb, listened to ...
10 time divorce
A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding ...
Notice
A newly married husband puts a notice in front of his home. For Sale: computer and encyclopedia, ...
Marriage Counselor
One day a couple visited a marriage counselor about their children. The wife says to the marriage ...
10 Husbands, Still a Virgin
A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she ...
He said, She said
He said to me . . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it. I said to ...
Wife Jokes
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming... 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it, 2. Whenever ...
Love and Marriage
In a great romance, each person plays a part the other really likes. - Elizabeth Ashley Many a ...
Widow
Three hicks were working on a telephone tower - Ted, Bruce and Jed. Ted falls off and is killed ...
Marriage
A married couple, both avid golfers, was discussing the future one night. "Honey", the wife said, " ...
Fortune
A newly married man asked his wife, 'Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a ...
Married
This man was talking to a group of men at a bar and he said, "In my house I am the boss, I say when ...
The Wife
* The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, ''What's on the TV?'' I said, ''Dust!'' * In the ...
Marriage Humour
Wife: 'What are you doing?' Husband: Nothing. Wife: 'Nothing...? You've been reading our ...
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? ( 1 ) You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, ...
Marriage
A woman was telling her friend, “It is I who made my husband a millionaire.” “And what was ...
You Do The Math...
You Do The Math... ROMANCE MATHEMATICS Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb ...
Marriage
Man is incomplete until he’s ...
Reading a book
A married couple was lying in bed one night. The wife is all curled up, ready to go to sleep, as ...
Perfect Marriage
RED SKELTON'S Recipe for the Perfect Marriage: 1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, ...
Old Friends
A fellow was invited to the home of some old friends for dinner. His buddy preceded every request ...
Husband and wife
My Dad and I were talking the other night about love and marriage. He told me that he knew as ...
Marry
A woman tells her husband she was diagnosed with cancer. Her husband tells he’s very sad and ...
Marriage Couseling
At a BBQ a couple was chatting with some guests when the marriage counseling topic came up. The ...
Marriage
My son wanted to know what it's like to be married. I told him to leave me alone and when he did I ...
Nothing
Husband: “Soon we will be married for 10 years. I will get you a nice new car for our anniversary. ...
Remarried
She married and had 13 children. Her husband died. She married again and had 7 more children. ...
Happy
“Now, that looks like a happily married couple.” Remarks the husband. “Don’t be too sure, ...
Never Argued
A recent widow was crying to a grief counselor. "We were married twenty-five years before he died," ...
Married Lives
Two husbands were discussing their married lives. Although happily married, they admitted that ...
Marriage
Two antennas's decided one day to get married. The wedding wasn't that good but the reception was ...
Married Couple
A couple had been married for 45 years and had raised a brood of 11 children and was blessed with 22 ...
Married in Heaven
On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple was involved in a fatal car accident. The ...
Pulling his Pud
A farmer finds his son behind the barn pulling his pud, and the old man exclaims, "Son, if you are ...
Married
Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden. Boy: ...
Getting Married
"My girlfriend and I are talking about getting married. She keeps asking me if I can support her, ...
Grill
A couple had been married 10 years. One afternoon, they were working in the garden together. As the ...
Married
Two antennae got married. The ceremony ...
Getting Married
Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want then, ...
Married
My son wanted to know what it's like to be married. I told him to leave me alone and when he did ...
Turned Down
A married couple are out one night at a dance club. There’s a guy on the dance floor giving it ...
Very elderly Widow
Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, ' ...
Marry
Three couples marry and stay at the same hotel for their honeymoons, where they are taken care of ...
Old lady
A lonely widow, age 70, decided that it was time to get married again. She put an ad in the local ...
Fairy
A married couple, both 60 years old, were celebrating their 35th anniversary. During their party, a ...
Married Men
They say that married men live longest. It's ...
A newly wed Couple
A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, ...
The millionaire husband
Man 1: I became a millionaire after marriage. Man 2: Wow! Your wife has sure bought lots of luck ...
Counseling
After 20 years of marriage a husband and wife go to counseling. When asked what the problem is, the ...
If I died
Woman: Would you get married again if I died? Man: Definitely not! Woman: Why not -- don't you ...
Three men
Three men were sitting in a bar talking about how whipped they had their wives. The first two ...
Married
A man is incomplete until he is ...
Married
A man is incomplete until he is ...
Golf Genie
A husband and wife, out enjoying a round of golf, were about to tee off on the third hole, which ...
Sexual Positions
It has been studied and determined that the most often used Sexual position for married couples ...
Pictures
On their first night together, a newlywed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the ...
Accident
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man's face was severely burned. The doctor ...
Whos your daddy?
A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor ...
Married
A man and woman are standing at the altar, about to be married, when the bride-to-be looks at her ...
Doing it in the Dark
There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband ...
What is Celibacy?
What is Celibacy? Celibacy can be a choice in life, or a condition imposed by circumstances. ...
My Wife
Stu said, "I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?" Leroy replied, "I'm not ...
Divorce in Heaven
There was a couple who was about to get married. Before the wedding, they had a tragic accident and ...
More Marriage
Wife : 'Do you want dinner?' Husband: 'Sure! ...
Supper
"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper." "What? Are you crazy? ...
Last Word
Two husbands were discussing their married lives. Although happily married, they admitted that ...
Married
Comebacks to that all time favorite question "Why Aren't You Married Yet?" You haven't asked yet. ...
An Irish Point of View on the Election race..
An Irish Point of View on the Election race.. We, in Ireland , can't figure out why people are ...
Happiness
HAPPINESS To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be ...
Golf Ball
A young couple gets married, and the groom asks his bride if he can have a dresser drawer of his ...
Married for 50 years
A couple had been married for 50 years. They were sitting at the breakfast table one morning when ...
Two Married Buddies
Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to the other and says, "You know, I ...
Bachelors
Bachelors know more about women than married ...
Married in Heaven
A man and a woman are on their way to their wedding. They get into a terrible car crash and are ...
Gotta pee
Two women friends had gone for a girl's night out. Both were very faithful and loving wives, ...
Married in heaven
On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple is involved in a fatal car accident. The ...
Newly weds
A new bride was a bit embarrassed to be known as a honeymooner. So when she and her husband ...
The Polish Divorce
A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl. Although his English was far from ...
The Secret to a Long and Happy Marriage
The Secret to a Long and Happy Marriage. A couple was celebrating their golden wedding ...
A young Couple
A young couple on the brink of divorce visit a marriage counsellor. The counsellor asks the wife ...
Halloween
A woman whose husband often came home drunk decided to cure him of the habit. One Halloween night, ...
Perfect Dave
Morris walks out into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, ...
Where's the Husband?
Three women sit in a beauty parlor talking about their husbands. The first woman says, "Last night ...
Old couple getting married
Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, living in Florida , are all excited about their decision to ...
ISN'T THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE WONDERFULLY CONFUSING???
ISN'T THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE WONDERFULLY CONFUSING??? A Polish man moved to the USA and married ...
A former Prostitute
A former prostitute with a rather well-used vagina that has been somewhat stretched is given a ...
Florida Vacation
An Illinois man left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida, his wife was ...
Marriage
A wife got so mad at her husband she packed his bags and told him to get out. As he walked to the ...

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