jokes about food
- New restaurant in NYC
- A chef from Beijing and a chef from Cairo met in NYC and decided to go into business together.
...
- BBQ Rules
- BBQ RULES We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory ...
- Dirty Meal
- A guy orders spaghetti in a restaurant. In the middle of eating he finds a hair in his food.
He ...
- Grill
- There’s that moment when you put your steak on the grill and your mouth waters all over from that ...
- Cannibal Restaurant
- A cannibal was walking through the jungle and came upon a restaurant opened by a fellow cannibal.
...
- Restaurant
- Did you hear about the restaurant ...
- Chef
- Did you hear about the Italian ...
- Food in the West
- On the Oregon trail a group of cowboys are on their way to the West. In the group of 20 or so, one ...
- Fast Food
- A friend and I were standing in line at a fast-food restaurant, waiting to place our order.
...
- Italian chef
- Did you hear about the Italian ...
- Italian Chef
- Did you hear about the Italian chef ...
- Big butt
- A man and his wife were doing yard work. The husband said to his wife, "Gee, honey, your butt is as ...
- Fat Guy
- A fat man goes into a fast food restaurant and orders his food. The cashier says that it will be a ...
- Fat Free
- A boy read a restaurant sign that advertised fat-free French fries. “Sounds great,” said the ...
- An elderly couple
- An elderly couple walk into a fast food restaurant. They order one hamburger, one order of fries ...
- Chef
- The chef was getting upset he was mixing up the spices for the recipe.
I told him it just takes a ...
- French Food
- Q. Why do the French like to eat snails ...
- Food
- That awkward moment when your girlfriend says she’s not hungry but ends up eating half of your ...
- Star Wars
- Luke Skywalker and R2-D2 go to a Chinese restaurant for dinner. Luke scans the menu and sees his ...
- Hamburger
- A man walks into a hamburger shop and orders a regular meal. Later, the waitress brings his meal to ...
- Pizza
- I’ve just burned my Hawaiian pizza.
...
- Pizza
- Here's another pizza delivery joke.
...
- Russian Dressing
- “You name it, we’ll make it!” Was the big sign outside the new restaurant on 13th Avenue. “ ...
- Born a Baptist
- Each Friday night after work, Bubba would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a venison steak. But, ...
- Pizza
- Have you heard that joke about ...
- 50/50
- A young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at McDonald's.
He noticed that they had ...
- Prayers
- TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't ...
- Fat
- I went to see the doctor today and he said to me, “Don’t eat anything fatty.” I said, “What ...
- McDonalds
- Did you read about the couple that lost the $10 million in the McDonald's contest because their ...
- Pizza
- Scientists have observed that when one pizza delivery guy falls over, several others also fall over. ...
- Pizza
- Make sure you always tip the people who ...
- Definition of Outdoor Barbecuing
- It's the only type of cooking a "real" man will do. When a man volunteers to do such cooking, the ...
- Prison food
- The guy who gives out food at the prison canteen asks: “Eat here or take away?”
The prisoner ...
- Food and Country
- Yesterday I was so Hungary, I decided to Czech if there was any food. I was Russian to the fridge, ...
- Roaches
- So these two roaches, Tom and Oscar, are hanging out next to a dumpster enjoying a snack. “Hey ...
- Lion
- Why did the lion eat the tightrope ...
- How Fights Start 5
- I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason took my order first. "I'll have the ...
- Food
- A Doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa.. 'The material we put into our stomachs is ...
- Bad Food
- A Doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough ...
- Difference
- What's the difference between a simple person and a pizza?
One is easy to cheat, the other is ...
- Restaurant
- A signboard outside a restaurant said: "Eat as much as you can and let your grandchildren pay the ...
- Idiot
- “I’d like to order a bar pizza,” the idiot says.
“Shall I ask them to cut it into six or ...
- Snails
- Q. Why do the French like to eat snails so ...
- Eat the Clock
- Have you ever tried eating the ...
- Restaurant
- There were three restauraunts on the same block. One day one of them put up a sign which said "The ...
- Special
- John was starving!! He was stuck in a small hick town, lost and hungry. He was happy when he saw a ...
- Texas
- Texas rancher and his wife were arguing while touring Paris. They were hardly speaking to each ...
- Cool Dad
- Little Johnny and his two friends are sitting on the front porch one day.
The first one says, "My ...
- Shot
- Doc, isn't it harmful to drink a shot before ...
- Choice
- If I were to choose between dating and eating a soup – I think I’d rather eat the soup. Not ...
- Restaurant
- I want to open a Jamaican/Irish/Spanish small plate breakfast restaurant
And call it "Tapas the ...
- Cannibal
- A cannibal was walking through the jungle and came upon a restaurant opened by a fellow cannibal. ...
- Dinner
- Every time I go out to dinner with my dad, he always walks into the restaurant and shouts, "Yes, we ...
- Grill
- A couple had been married 10 years. One afternoon, they were working in the garden together. As the ...
- Restaurant
- I'm going to open a restaurant that serves a fusion of Hawaiian and Jamaican cuisines
I'm going to ...
- Older Folks 3.
- An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table ...
- A Trucker
- A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, "I want three flat tires, a ...
- The truck stop
- A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, I want three flat tires, a ...
- Misunderstanding
- Jim was in a bad mood, and anyone who got in is way was going to regret it. Jim walked into his ...
- Well Done
- Jim was in a bad mood, and anyone who got in is way was going to regret it. Jim walked into his ...
- Restaurant
- Today, I walked into a restaurant.
"Hi, is my table ready?"
"No, not yet sir. Do you mind ...
- Product Warnings 2
- Product Warnings
Dumb and Funny Warning Labels On Products:
Old Spice Red Zone Deoderant
Use ...
- Hit
- What did the chef say when he got hit ...
- Eating Grass
- A wealthy lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. ...
- Pizza
- A college pizza delivery boy arrived at the house of Mr.Smith. He delivered the pizza to his ...
- Another Affair
- A man walks into a nightclub one night. He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer. Certainly, Sir, ...
- German Food
- What did the critic think of German ...
- Man of the house
- The husband had just finished reading a new book entitled, YOU CAN BE THE MAN OF YOUR HOUSE.
He ...
- Men
- What is the thinnest book in the world?
What men know about women!
Why don't men eat more M & M' ...
- Chinene Food
- After having Chinese food, my cookie was missing the piece of paper on the inside!
It was ...
- Train
- There was a man in Bulgaria who drove a train for a living.
He loved his job, driving a train ...
- Restaurant
- I went to a restaurant for dinner last night without making reservation. The maître d' told me a ...
- You are what you eat
- Today I bought some ready to eat chicken
...
- Sea food
- Crab -- It's too much work. They're like the pistachio of seafood. And there's that nasty part of ...
- You might be a college student if . .
- 1. If you have ever price shopped for Top Ramen, you might be a college student.
2. If you live ...
- Anniversary
- Top ten things not to say on your Anniversary
10. I stopped caring about anniversaries when you ...
- Vegan
- I decided to go Vegan yesterday.
...
- Food
- My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a ...
- Bugs
- A boy asks his father, “Daddy, are bugs good to eat?”
“That’s disgusting," replies the dad, ...
- Math
- Q: What is the difference between a Ph.D. in mathematics and a large pizza?
A: A large pizza can ...
- Dear for Dinner
- A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner. Both he and his wife decide that they won' ...
- Australian Cooking
- I watched an Australian cooking show and everyone cheered when the chef made a meringue.
Seemed ...
- eating
- Gary and Mary go on their honeymoon, and Gary spends six hours of the honeymoon night eating Mary's ...
- Southern FOLKS
- Southern FOLKS know their summer weather report:
Humidity
Humidity
Humidity
Southern FOLKS ...
- Chicken
- It took me two hours to grill a chicken the other day.
And it still didn't tell my why it ...
- Table
- How to get a table in a busy restaurant..
Yesterday, I went to a restaurant. It was full with no ...
- Eat Computer
- How do you eat a ...
- Eat
- This guy was watching TV as his wife was out cutting the grass during the hot summer. He finally ...
- Marriage Couseling
- At a BBQ a couple was chatting with some guests when the marriage counseling topic came up. The ...
- Pie
- Eating too much is a sin.
Except eating ...
- Fatty
- Doctor: Don't eat anything fatty.
Me: Can I eat sugar instead?
Doctor: No fatty, don't eat ...
- Chili
- A guy sits down in a diner and asks for a bowl of hot chili.
The waitress says, "Sorry, but the ...
- Older folks 6.
- A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy:
"So I hear you're getting married?"
"Yep!"
" ...
- Leftovers
- “Oh no! not leftovers again!” complained my older sister when she saw the leftover meatloaf on ...
- Fast Food Fun
- Fast Food Fun
Haven't you ever had the urge to loose control when ordering that burrito or ...
- Survivor Show
- Have you heard about the next planned "Survivor" show?
* 6 men will be dropped on an island with ...
- PhD
- After many years of studying at a university, I’ve finally become a PhD… or Pizza Hut ...
- Friends
- My dog just attacked the pizza delivery ...
- Breakfast
- At school one morning the teacher asked little Johnny what he had for breakfast. Little Johnny said, ...
- Zombies
- Why don’t zombies eat popcorn with their ...