jokes about doctors

Turns out my doctor has no sense of humour
Not sure if I need to cook this or bring it to the doctor
They should name a hospital ship this
A wise doctor one wrote
kid gives doctor advice to examine grandpa
A wise doctor once wrote
Dog pigs up drugs at a pharmacy
Doctor, Im not a tall well
At the doctors #homeopathic
How to get your kids to take medicine
A picture tells a thousand words #arrow #hospital
If this goes right, they thank Jesus
Why is it called a vet #doctor #dog
Campbells giving good advice
Girl gives a giftcard for christmas so it cant be spend on drugs
what a doctor and a woman have in common
A great lesson to teach your kids #motorcycle #drugs #money
Told the doctor I broke my arm in two places
woman going to the doctor
doctors protest bad handwriting
Psychology
In a class on abnormal psychology, the instructor was about to introduce the subject of manic ...
Crazy people talk
A doctor of psychology was doing his normal morning rounds when he entered a patient's room. He ...
Mental Hospital
There was this man in a mental hospital. All day he would put his ear to the wall and listen. The ...
The Cure
A woman went to the doctor's office and was seen by one of the new young doctors. After about four ...
A man went to the doctor
He said, "Doc, you gotta check my leg. Something's wrong. Just put your ear up to my thigh, you'll ...
Drugs
Two young guys were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared in court on Friday before ...
Doctor VS Druggist
An older man strode in to his doctors office and said, "Doc, my druggist said to tell you to change ...
Shaking
Man goes to the doctors and says "Doctor, I cant stop my hands from shaking !" Doctor replies "Do ...
Doctor
A strained voice called out through the darkened theater, "Please, is there a doctor in the house?!" ...
Dr. Doctor
Two doctors opened an office in a small town. They put up a sign reading: "Dr Smith and Dr Jones, ...
Sweet Tea
A woman goes to the doctor all black and blue .. Doctor: "What happened?" Woman: "Doctor, I ...
Doctors
A man was constipated, so he decided to go to the doctor. The doctor examined him and explained, " ...
Poker
A doctor got a phone call from one of his colleagues. “We need a fourth for poker,” the voice ...
Shot
Two buddies go duck hunting. They had been hunting for a while when one had to take a dump. So he ...
An apple a day
My wife, a phlebotomist at the Denver VA hospital, entered a patient’s room to draw blood. ...
Problem
Santa went to the Doctors with a problem. Doctor: What seems to be the problem? Santa: I seem to ...
Alabama birth control
A man and and a woman from Alabama don't want any more children because they already have 11. So ...
Erectile Dysfunction
On my 60th birthday, I got a gift certificate from my wife. The certificate paid for a visit to a ...
Two Doctors
Two doctors opened an office in a small town and put up a sign reading "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, ...
Sunburn
A man passed out on the beach in Miami for four hours, and got a horrible sunburn, specifically to ...
The Decision
A man wakes up in the hospital, bandaged from head to foot. The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I ...
Shopping
A woman was in town on a shopping trip. She began her day finding the most perfect shoes in the ...
Old couple getting married
Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, living in Florida , are all excited about their decision to ...
Whos your daddy?
A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor ...
Older Folks 4.
Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged. However, while working as ...
Lord Nelson
The new inmate at the mental hospital announced in a loud voice that he was the famous British ...
Hell
one day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he's wallowing in despair, he has his first ...
Hillbilly
A Forty -Year -Old hillbilly carries a younger hillbilly into the doctors office, deposited him on ...
A 93-year-old woman
A 93-year-old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband, decided ...
Nurse
A nurse was showing some student nurses through the hospital. "This will be the most hazardous ...
Death
Mildred was a 93-year-old woman, particularly despondent over the death of her husband, Earl. She ...
Checkup
A 75 year-old man goes to his doctor for a check-up.
Doctor: "You're doing fairly well for ...
Commit suicide
A blonde hurries into the hospital emergency room late one night with the tip of her index finger ...
Mental Hospital
I was walking past the mental hospital the other day,and all the patients were shouting ,'13....13.. ...
Death
A middle-aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table, ...
Pregnant
A young girl was very much interested in the progress of her mother’s pregnancy. Finally the day ...
kids in the Hospital
Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on beds next to each other, outside the operating room. ...
Disease
A man goes to the doctor. Man: "Doctor, I think I have a problem! I can't stop singing What's New ...
How long to live?
A man hasn't been feeling well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete checkup. Afterward, the ...
Doctor
A woman burst out of the examining room screaming after her young physician tells her she is ...
Cold
A man went to see his doctor because he was suffering from a miserable cold. His doctor prescribed ...
Stupid
A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, " ...
A doctor and a lawyer
A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by ...
Doctor
A man visits his doctor with celery stalks stuck in each ear and a carrot stick up each nostril. ...
A Bar
A bear walks into a bar in Billings, Montana and sits down. He bangs on the bar with his paw and ...
80
Sam goes to the doctor for his yearly checkup. “Everything is fine”, said the doctor, “You’ ...
Lubricant
Murphy's' old lady had been pregnant for some time and now the time had come. He brought her to ...
Doctor
Doctor, doctor you've got to help me - I just can't stop my hands shaking! Do you drink a lot? ...
Sally
A couple lived near the ocean and used to walk the beach a lot. One summer they noticed a girl who ...
Older Folks 8.
Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later, the doctor saw ...
Blond
Q: Why did the blond tip toe past the medicine cabinet? A: So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping ...
Beach Girl
A couple lived near the ocean and used to walk the beach a lot. One summer they noticed a girl who ...
The Saw Mill
Bill and Tom are two Irishmen working at the local sawmill. One day Bill slips and his arm gets ...
Giving birth
Mike and his pregnant wife live on a farm in a rural area in the west of England. No running water, ...
Bowel Movements
An old man goes to see the doctor. "it's about my bowel movements..." says the old man. "Are they ...
Six Months to live
A patient was at her doctor's office after undergoing a complete physical exam. The doctor said, "I ...
Pil
A man goes to the doctor with a swollen leg. After a careful examination, the doctor gives the man ...
An 80 year old Man
80 year old man went to the doctor for a checkup and the doctor was amazed at what good shape the ...
Cucumber
A man walks into a doctor's office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a ...
A 82-year old Man
Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later the doctor ...
Laryngitis
A man called his doctor and said, “Doctor, I think that my wife has come down with a case of ...
Old Lady
An old lady comes to her doctor and says, “Doctor, you know how you told me I should avoid going ...
Turkey Hunter
An 80 year old man went to the doctor for a check-up and the doctor was amazed at what good shape ...
Yellow 24
A man goes to the doctors and asks why he's been feeling ill. The doctor examines him and replies " ...
90 year old father
A 90 year old man was having his annual checkup and the doctor asked him how he was feeling.
...
30 more Years
In surgery for a heart attack, a middle-aged woman has a vision of God by her bedside. “Will I ...
Irish Saw mill Accident
Paddy and Mick are two Irishmen working at the local saw mill. One day, Mick slips and his arm ...
Pretty Pussy
John gets home from work one day and finds his pretty blonde wife has been crying. "What's wrong?" ...
Farts
An old lady goes to the doctor and says, "I have this problem with frequent gas. Fortunately, the ...
Farts
An old lady goes to the doctor and says, "I have this problem with frequent gas. Fortunately, the ...
Food
Q: Where do you learn to make banana splits? A: At sundae school. Q: Why did the melon jump ...
The Love Story of Ralph and Edna
THE LOVE STORY OF RALPH & EDNA Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, ...
The Late Tommy Cooper--Comic
The Late Tommy Cooper--Comic 1. Two blondes walked into a building... you'd think at least one ...
Bill
A doctor and a lawyer were both at a reception. The lawyer noticed that people were constantly ...
Grandpa
A six year old goes to the hospital with her grandmother to visit her Grandpa When they ...
Shy Guy
A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the other end. After an hour ...
Moderation
Doctor to patient: "Do you like to drink, smoke, and play around with women?"
"Yes doctor," ...
Pizza
A college pizza delivery boy arrived at the house of Mr.Smith. He delivered the pizza to his ...
Number 11
This is the story of a man who has a pretty classic life. Single, he has a normal job in a bank, ...
Twins
A man was taking his wife, who was pregnant with twins, to the hospital when his car went out of ...
Fat
A young woman was having a physical examination and was very embarrassed because of a weight ...
Med School
First-year students at Med School were receiving their first anatomy class with a real dead human ...
THE WASHCLOTH
I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received ...
Who's The Father?
A lady was in the delivery room starting to deliver her baby. As it made its appearance it was dark ...
Older Folks 1.
An elderly gentleman... Had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor ...
The testicles of a Texas midget
The testicles of a Texas midget hurt and ached almost all the time. The midget went to the doctor ...
Mental Institution
Jon and Dan are in a mental institution which has an annual contest that picks two of the best ...
An Arkansas Delivery
In the backwoods of Arkansas, Mr. Stewart's wife went into labor in the middle of the night. The ...
A Green Spot
A woman goes to her doctor's office,to discuss a strange development. She has discovered a green ...
A doctor in Newfoundland
A doctor in Newfoundland wanted to get off work and go hunting, so he approached his assistant. " ...
Smaller
A guy says, "Doctor, Doctor! Help me, I keep thinking I'm getting smaller!" Doctor replies, "Well, ...
Rabies
Doctor: I’m sorry to have to tell you that you may have rabies, and it could prove fatal. ...
Three lunatics
Three lunatics approach their Asylum doctor with a request for a weekend pass to the local city. ...
Red Ears
A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her what had happened to her ...
The New Doctor in Town
A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a doctor who was retiring. The older ...
Puns
Puns 1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but ...
Flu
My four year old daughter had a terrible case of the flu, she was achy, had a high fever, and was ...
Pen
A doctor walks in to an exam room, searching for a pen in his pocket. The doctor pulls out a ...
Doctor
She: I have a doctor’s appointment today but I really don’t want to go… He: Just call in ...
An 80-year-old Man
An 80-year-old man went to his doctor for his annual check-up. The doctor asks him how he's feeling. ...

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