jokes about doctors
- Psychology
- In a class on abnormal psychology, the instructor was about to introduce the subject of manic ...
- Crazy people talk
- A doctor of psychology was doing his normal morning rounds when he entered a patient's room.
He ...
- Mental Hospital
- There was this man in a mental hospital. All day he would put his ear to the wall and listen. The ...
- Drugs
- Two young guys were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared in court on Friday before ...
- The Cure
- A woman went to the doctor's office and was seen by one of the new young doctors. After about four ...
- Doctor VS Druggist
- An older man strode in to his doctors office and said, "Doc, my druggist said to tell you to change ...
- Shaking
- Man goes to the doctors and says "Doctor, I cant stop my hands from shaking !" Doctor replies "Do ...
- Doctor
- A strained voice called out through the darkened theater, "Please, is there a doctor in the house?!" ...
- A man went to the doctor
- He said, "Doc, you gotta check my leg. Something's wrong. Just put your ear up to my thigh, you'll ...
- Dr. Doctor
- Two doctors opened an office in a small town.
They put up a sign reading: "Dr Smith and Dr Jones, ...
- Sweet Tea
- A woman goes to the doctor all black and blue ..
Doctor: "What happened?"
Woman: "Doctor, I ...
- Doctors
- A man was constipated, so he decided to go to the doctor.
The doctor examined him and explained, " ...
- Poker
- A doctor got a phone call from one of his colleagues. “We need a fourth for poker,” the voice ...
- Shot
- Two buddies go duck hunting. They had been hunting for a while when one had to take a dump. So he ...
- An apple a day
- My wife, a phlebotomist at the Denver VA hospital, entered a patient’s room to draw blood. ...
- Alabama birth control
- A man and and a woman from Alabama don't want any more children because they already have 11. So ...
- Problem
- Santa went to the Doctors with a problem.
Doctor: What seems to be the problem?
Santa: I seem to ...
- Hospital
- I was in the hospital bed when a nurse came up to me and said, "Would you like me to inform anyone ...
- Erectile Dysfunction
- On my 60th birthday, I got a gift certificate from my wife. The certificate paid for a visit to a ...
- Duck Doctor
- Why can’t you trust duck ...
- Sunburn
- A man passed out on the beach in Miami for four hours, and got a horrible sunburn, specifically to ...
- The Decision
- A man wakes up in the hospital, bandaged from head to foot.
The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I ...
- Two Doctors
- Two doctors opened an office in a small town and put up a sign reading "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, ...
- Shopping
- A woman was in town on a shopping trip. She began her day finding the most perfect shoes in the ...
- Old couple getting married
- Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, living in Florida ,
are all excited about their decision to ...
- Santas Problem
- Santa went to the Doctors with a problem.
Doctor: What seems to be the problem?
Santa: I seem to ...
- Whos your daddy?
- A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor ...
- Older Folks 4.
- Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged. However, while working as ...
- Lord Nelson
- The new inmate at the mental hospital announced in a loud voice that he was the famous British ...
- Hell
- one day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he's wallowing in despair, he has his first ...
- Hillbilly
- A Forty -Year -Old hillbilly carries a younger hillbilly into the doctors office, deposited him on ...
- A 93-year-old woman
- A 93-year-old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband, decided ...
- Nurse
- A nurse was showing some student nurses through the hospital. "This will be the most hazardous ...
- Death
- Mildred was a 93-year-old woman, particularly despondent over the death of her husband, Earl. She ...
- Upset Pirate
- A pirate goes to see his doctor on account that he's been feeling down and depressed after losing ...
- Checkup
- A 75 year-old man goes to his doctor for a check-up.
Doctor: "You're doing fairly well for ... - Commit suicide
- A blonde hurries into the hospital emergency room late one night with the tip of her index finger ...
- Mental Hospital
- I was walking past the mental hospital the other day,and all the patients were shouting ,'13....13.. ...
- Death
- A middle-aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table, ...
- Pregnant
- A young girl was very much interested in the progress of her mother’s pregnancy. Finally the day ...
- Disease
- A man goes to the doctor.
Man: "Doctor, I think I have a problem! I can't stop singing What's New ...
- kids in the Hospital
- Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on beds next to each other, outside the operating room.
...
- How long to live?
- A man hasn't been feeling well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete checkup. Afterward, the ...
- Cold
- A man went to see his doctor because he was suffering from a miserable cold. His doctor prescribed ...
- Stupid
- A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She
started her class by saying, " ...
- Doctor
- A woman burst out of the examining room screaming after her young physician tells her she is ...
- A doctor and a lawyer
- A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by ...
- Doctor
- A man visits his doctor with celery stalks stuck in each ear and a carrot stick up each nostril.
...
- A Bar
- A bear walks into a bar in Billings, Montana and sits down. He bangs on the bar with his paw and ...
- 80
- Sam goes to the doctor for his yearly checkup. “Everything is fine”, said the doctor, “You’ ...
- Lubricant
- Murphy's' old lady had been pregnant for some time and now the time had come. He brought her to ...
- Doctor
- Doctor, doctor you've got to help me - I just can't stop my hands shaking!
Do you drink a lot?
...
- Sally
- A couple lived near the ocean and used to walk the beach a lot. One summer they noticed a girl who ...
- Older Folks 8.
- Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.
A few days later, the doctor saw ...
- Blond
- Q: Why did the blond tip toe past the medicine cabinet?
A: So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping ...
- Beach Girl
- A couple lived near the ocean and used to walk the beach a lot. One summer they noticed a girl who ...
- Giving birth
- Mike and his pregnant wife live on a farm in a rural area in the west of England. No running water, ...
- Bowel Movements
- An old man goes to see the doctor.
"it's about my bowel movements..." says the old man.
"Are they ...
- Six Months to live
- A patient was at her doctor's office after undergoing a complete physical exam. The doctor said, "I ...
- The Saw Mill
- Bill and Tom are two Irishmen working at the local sawmill. One day Bill slips and his arm gets ...
- Pil
- A man goes to the doctor with a swollen leg. After a careful examination, the doctor gives the man ...
- An 80 year old Man
- 80 year old man went to the doctor for a checkup and the doctor was amazed at what good shape the ...
- Cucumber
- A man walks into a doctor's office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a ...
- A 82-year old Man
- Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.
A few days later the doctor ...
- Laryngitis
- A man called his doctor and said, “Doctor, I think that my wife has come down with a case of ...
- Old Lady
- An old lady comes to her doctor and says, “Doctor, you know how you told me I should avoid going ...
- Turkey Hunter
- An 80 year old man went to the doctor for a check-up and the doctor was amazed at what good shape ...
- 90 year old father
- A 90 year old man was having his annual checkup and the doctor asked him how he was feeling.
... - Yellow 24
- A man goes to the doctors and asks why he's been feeling ill. The doctor examines him and replies " ...
- 30 more Years
- In surgery for a heart attack, a middle-aged woman has a vision of God by her bedside. “Will I ...
- Sick Boy
- A four year old boy was brought to hospital with a terrible cough, high temperature, and vomiting.
...
- Pretty Pussy
- John gets home from work one day and finds his pretty blonde wife has been crying.
"What's wrong?" ...
- Farts
- An old lady goes to the doctor and says, "I have this problem with frequent gas. Fortunately, the ...
- Farts
- An old lady goes to the doctor and says, "I have this problem with frequent gas. Fortunately, the ...
- Irish Saw mill Accident
- Paddy and Mick are two Irishmen working at the local saw mill.
One day, Mick slips and his arm ...
- Food
- Q: Where do you learn to make banana splits?
A: At sundae school.
Q: Why did the melon jump ...
- The Late Tommy Cooper--Comic
- The Late Tommy Cooper--Comic
1. Two blondes walked into a building... you'd think at least one ...
- The Love Story of Ralph and Edna
- THE LOVE STORY OF RALPH & EDNA
Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, ...
- Bill
- A doctor and a lawyer were both at a reception. The lawyer noticed that people were constantly ...
- Moderation
- Doctor to patient: "Do you like to drink, smoke, and play around with women?"
"Yes doctor," ... - Shy Guy
- A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the other end. After an hour ...
- Grandpa
- A six year old goes to the hospital with her grandmother to visit her Grandpa
When they ...
- Number 11
- This is the story of a man who has a pretty classic life. Single, he has a normal job in a bank, ...
- Pizza
- A college pizza delivery boy arrived at the house of Mr.Smith. He delivered the pizza to his ...
- Fat
- A young woman was having a physical examination and was very embarrassed because of a weight ...
- Med School
- First-year students at Med School were receiving their first anatomy class with a real dead human ...
- Who's The Father?
- A lady was in the delivery room starting to deliver her baby. As it made its appearance it was dark ...
- Older Folks 1.
- An elderly gentleman...
Had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor ...
- The testicles of a Texas midget
- The testicles of a Texas midget hurt and ached almost all the time. The midget went to the doctor ...
- Twins
- A man was taking his wife, who was pregnant with twins, to the hospital when his car went out of ...
- THE WASHCLOTH
- I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received ...
- Mental Institution
- Jon and Dan are in a mental institution which has an annual contest that picks two of the best ...
- An Arkansas Delivery
- In the backwoods of Arkansas, Mr. Stewart's wife went into labor in the middle of the night. The ...
- A Green Spot
- A woman goes to her doctor's office,to discuss a strange development. She has discovered a green ...
- A doctor in Newfoundland
- A doctor in Newfoundland wanted to get off work and go hunting, so he approached his assistant.
" ...
- Smaller
- A guy says, "Doctor, Doctor! Help me, I keep thinking I'm getting smaller!"
Doctor replies, "Well, ...
- Rabies
- Doctor: I’m sorry to have to tell you that you may have rabies, and it could prove fatal.
...
- Three lunatics
- Three lunatics approach their Asylum doctor with a request for a weekend pass to the local city.
...
- Red Ears
- A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her
what had happened to her ...
- The New Doctor in Town
- A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a doctor who was retiring. The older ...
