The Old Man
An 85-year-old man went to his doctor's office for his annual physical. After the physical, the Doctor asked him to get some sperm for testing.. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this home and bring back some semen tomorrow."
The Old Man went home and tried with his right and left hand with no results. The Old man than called his wife in to help him. She tried and tried with the same results.
The Wife then suggested they ask the Young/Pretty lady that lived next door. They both went next Door and asked the young girl, who said she would be happy to help. She also tried and tried with the same results.
The next day the 85-year-old man went back to the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day. The doctor asked what happened and the man explained: "Well, doc, it's like this - First I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.
Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, and still nothing. We even called up Arleen, the young lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, but still nothing."
The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?" to help you get Sperm.
The old man replied, No we asked her to help us open the damn Jar. And no matter what we tried, we still couldn't get the jar open.