Good, Bad and Ugly

1. Good: Your wife is pregnant. Bad: It's triplets. Ugly: You had a vasectomy 5 years ago. 2. Good: Your wife is not talking to you. Bad: She wants a divorce. Ugly: She is a Lawyer. 3. Good: Your son is finally maturing. Bad: He's involved with the woman next door. Ugly: So are you. 4. Good: Your son studies a lot in his room. Bad: You find several porn movies hidden there. Ugly: You're in them. 5. Good: Your hubby and you agree, no more kids. Bad: You can't find your birth control pills. Ugly: Your 13 year old daughter borrowed them. 6. Good: Your husband understands fashion. Bad: He's a cross-dresser. Ugly: He looks better than you. 7. Good: You give the "birds and bees" talk to your daughter. Bad: She keeps interrupting. Ugly: With corrections. 8. Good: The postman's early. Bad: He's wearing fatigues and carrying a gun. Ugly: You gave him nothing for Christmas. 9. Good: Your son is dating someone new. Bad: It's another man. Ugly: He's your best friend. 10. Good: Your daughter got a new job. Bad: As a hooker. Ugly: Your co-workers are her best clients. Way Ugly: She makes more money than you do!