Toilet seat

Speeding

A man was pulled over for speeding. The officer walks up to the car and says to the driver, "Look, I've had a long day and my shift is almost over. If you can give me a good reason why you're speeding, I'll let it slide" The man replies, "well, officer, my wife left me a few weeks ago for a cop. I thought you were trying to bring her back."
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