Deep thoughts

Deep Thoughts For Those Who Take Things Way Too Serious - A day without sunshine is like...night. - He who laughs last thinks slowest. - On the other hand, you have different fingers - I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder. - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap. - 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot. - 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. - Remember, half the people you know are below average. - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm. - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. - If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments. - OK, . . . . so what's the speed of dark? - Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now. - Every one has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film. - How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges? - What happens if you get scared half to death twice? - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name? - Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. - Just remember - if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off. - Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. - Life isn't like a box of chocolates; it's more like a jar of jalapeno's. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow. - How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.