Christmas

1. What do you call an obnoxious reindeer? Rude-olph. 2. What did the stamp say to the Christmas card? Stick with me and we'll go places! 3. How is Christmas exactly like your job? You do all the work and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit. 4. Why did no one bid for Rudolph and Blitzen on eBay? Because they were two deer! 5. What do you call a scary-looking reindeer? A cari-boo. 6. What does the Queen call her Christmas Broadcast? The One Show! 7. What do reindeers say before they tell you a joke? This one's gonna sleigh you! 8. What do you call Santa's little helpers? Subordinate clauses. 9. Why don't you ever see Santa in the hospital? Because he has private elf care! 10. What's the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet? The Christmas alphabet has No-els. 11. Why is it getting harder to buy Advent calendars? Their days are numbered! 12. How do you know when Santa's around? You can always sense his presents. 13. How did Scrooge win the football game? The ghost of Christmas passed!